Just For Laughs

One day, two rednecks named Bubba and Earl were driving down the road, drinking a couple of Buds. The passenger, Bubba, said, "Lookey thar up ahead Earl. It's a po-leece roadblock. We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!" "Don't worry Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, then throw the bottles und...er the seat." "What fer?" asked Bubba. "Just let me do the talking, okay?" said Earl. They finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat and slapped the labels on their foreheads. When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff asked, "Have you boys been drinking?" "No sir," replied Earl. "We're on the patch!"

On This Day in History

September 15 Events: 1858 - The first mail service begins to the Pacific Coast of the U.S between Tipton, MO and San Francisco, CA. 1923 - Oklahoma was placed under martial law by Gov. John Calloway Walton due to terrorist activity by the Ku Klux Klan. 1928 - Alexander Fleming discovered the antibiotic penicillin in the mold Penicillium notatum. 1935 - The Nuremberg Laws were enacted by Nazi Germany. The act stripped all German Jews of their civil rights and the swastika was made the official symbol of Nazi Germany. 1940 - The German Luftwaffe suffered the loss of 185 planes in the Battle of Britain. 1949 - "The Lone Ranger" premiered on ABC. Clayton Moore was the Lone Ranger and Jay Silverheels was Tonto. 1965 - "Green Acres" premiered on CBS TV. 1978 - Muhammad Ali defeated Leon Spinks to win his 3rd World Heavyweight Boxing title. 1982 - The first issue of "USA Today" was published. 1997 - The domain name "google.com" was registered.

Famous Birthdays

September 15 Famous Birthdays: 1857 - William H. Taft (27th US President) 1890 - Agatha Christie (Mystery writer) 1946 - Oliver Stone (Director) 1946 - Tommy Lee Jones (Actor) 1961 - Dan Marino (NFL Quarterback) 1984 - Prince Harry of Wales (Prince)

Where Did That Come From?

TO SELL SOMEONE DOWN THE RIVER: This way of saying someone has been deceived or betrayed probably originated in the late 19th century in the Southern states of America. By then it was illegal to import slaves, so there was an internal trade where slaves were brought down the Mississippi to the slave markets. So if a slave was ‘sold down the river’, he lost his home and family.

Betcha Didn't Know This!

In almost every category - culturally, economically, climatically, racially, linguistically, ethnically, and religiously India is the most diverse countries in the world.

On the Light Side

The most important thing for a woman is financial security. *** Although this is so important, they still go out and buy expensive clothes and stuff. ***Although they always buy expensive clothes, they say they never have something to wear. ***Although they never have something to wear, they always dress beautifully. ***Although they always dress beautifully, their clothes are always just ‘an old rag’. ***Although their clothes are always ‘just an old rag’, they still expect you to compliment them. ***Although they expect you to compliment them, when you do, they do not believe you.

Kids Say the Darndest Things

A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later: “Daa-aad” “What” said the father. “I’m thirsty, can you bring me a drink of water?” “No, you had your chance. Lights out.” Five minutes later: “Daa-aaad” “What!?” I’m THIRSTY can I have a drink of water?” I told you “NO! If you ask again, I’ll have to spank you!” Five minutes later….”Daaaa-aaaaaaad….. When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a drink of water?”