Just For Laughs
Bob left work one Friday evening. But it was payday, so instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with his mates and spending his entire wages. When he finally appeared at home on Sunday night, he was confronted by his angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions. Finally his wife stopped the nagging and said to him, “How would you like it if you didn’t see me for two or three days?” He replied, “That would be fine with me.” Monday went by and he didn’t see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. But on Thursday, the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.
On This Day in History
December 5 Events: 1492 - Christopher Columbus becomes the first European to set foot on the island of Hispaniola. 1932 - German-born Swiss physicist Albert Einstein is granted an American visa. 1955 - Martin Luther King, Jr. leads the Montgomery Bus Boycott. 1996 - At 18 years old, Jermaine O'Neal becomes the NBA's youngest player.
Famous Birthdays
DECEMBER 5 Famous Birthdays: 1782 - Martin Van Buren (8th US President) 1839 - George Custer (General) 1901 - Walt Disney (Founder of Disney) 1976 - Amy Acker (Actress) 1985 - Frankie Muniz (Actor- Agent Cody Banks/Malcom in the Middle)
Where Did That Come From?
BUTTER SOMEONE UP: To flatter someone. History: An ancient Indian custom involved throwing balls of clarified butter at statues of the gods to seek favor.
Betcha Didn't Know This!
Katharine Lee Bates wrote the lyrics to the song America the Beautiful after traveling to the top of Pike's Peak.
On the Light Side
A group of friends who went deer hunting separated into pairs for the day. That night, one hunter returned alone, staggering under a huge buck. “Where’s Harry?” asked another hunter. “He fainted a couple miles up the trail,” Harry’s partner answered. “You left him lying there alone and carried the deer back?” “It was a tough decision,” said the hunter. “But I figured no one is going to steal Harry!”
Kids Say the Darndest Things
A little boy had been pawing over the stock of greeting cards at a stationery store. After a few minutes the clerk became curious and asked, "Just what is it you're looking for, sonny? Birthday greeting? Message to a sick friend? Anniversary congratulations to your mom and dad?" The boy shook his head, "No." "Then what kind of card is it that you want?" asked the clerk. The boy answered, "Got anything in the line of blank report cards?"