Just For Laughs
A boy stood alone on the baseball field, engrossed in tossing a ball in the air with one hand, firmly grasps his bat with both hands, and swings to try to hit the ball as it comes down. But each time, the ball plopped to the ground right in front of him. Undaunted, the little fellow would again pick up the ball and toss it in the air. Again he would take a mighty swing, and again the baseball would thud to the ground. A man who had been watching this sad exhibition had to speak up. “Not having much luck, are you, little man?” “What do you mean?” the boy asked. “Well, I’ve been watching you for 15 minutes, and you haven’t hit one ball.” “Shows how good I am!” the boy snapped back with a wide grin. “I’m a pitcher!”
On This Day in History
April 1 Events: 1826 - The internal combustion engine is patented by Samuel Morey. 1867 - Singapore becomes British crown colony. 1891 - The Wrigley Company is founded in Chicago, Illinois. 1954 - The United States Air Force Academy is established in Colorado. 1976 - Apple Computer Company is formed by Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak.
April 1 Famous Birthdays: 1578 - William Harvey (Scientist and doctor) 1850 - Otto von Bismark (German Empire founder) 1932 - Debbie Reynolds (Actress) 1938 - Ali McGraw (Actress) 1961 - Susan Boyle (Singer) 1981 - Hannah Spearitt (Singer) 1997 - Asa Butterfield (Child actor from Hugo)
Where Did That Come From?
BAKER’S DOZEN: A baker’s dozen means thirteen. This old saying is said to come from the days when bakers were severely punished for baking underweight loaves. Some added a loaf to a batch of a dozen to be above suspicion.
Betcha Didn't Know This!
Hans Langseth had the longest beard at a record length of 17 1/2 feet long! When he died, his beard was given to the Smithsonian Institute.
On the Light Side
The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. "What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife. "They're on sale, only for 24 cans" he replies. "Put them back, we can't afford them" demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping. A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a jar of face cream and puts it in the basket. "What do you think you're doing?" asks the husband. "It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful," replies the wife. Her husband retorts: "So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price."
Kids Say the Darndest Things
Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing. "Sis," he said, "I wish you'd sing Christmas carols." "That’s nice of you, Alfie," she replied, "but why?" Alfie replied, "Because then I'd only have to hear your voice once a year!"